Yoga is ridiculous. We pretzel-ize ourselves, straining and huffing and puffing, all in the name of mind-body balance, relaxation, and some would even say…enlightenment. Yoga teachers always claim that doing certain poses “stimulates your lymph nodes” or “improves sluggish digestion” or “ruptures your kidneys”. Today I learned a new pose: scorpion. And let me tell you, that one is MESSED UP. After trying that pose I suspect the only thing I improved is my chiropractor’s bank account.
At the end of class we were lying on our mats in what I was informed was “Extended Butterfly Pose”. How interesting! That pose is exactly like how I might lie on the floor in my apt in front of the TV, just being a slug! I had no idea I was actually in a yoga pose!
So then I realized I was doing yoga poses all the time, and so is my husband. Here are our favorites:
COUCH POTATO POSE
EXTENDED COUCH POTATO POSE
OVER-REACHING RUNNER’S POSE
And the truly transformative…
I’M-NOT-A-MONEY-TREE POSE!
To true!